Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
