You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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