wake up i wanna do it froggy style
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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