I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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