i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Randomize
