The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Randomize
