Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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