Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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