Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
