all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Randomize
