walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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