I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
