He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
