You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
