they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
