Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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