did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
