i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize