don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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