bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
