Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
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