you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
