Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
