Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
