I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
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