Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
