Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
