We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
