Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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