he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
