we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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