We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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