Texts From Last Night

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  (209): View more from California

  dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity

  (1-209): View more from California

  nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all

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  (209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity (1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all http://tfl.nu/t93h
  Replies (45) Good night (15590) Bad night (1758)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.

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  (201): the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called. http://tfl.nu/7ag1
  Replies (9) Good night (890) Bad night (2466)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I'm on my period, period, period

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  (540): birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex (703): I'm on my period, period, period http://tfl.nu/vsrk
  Replies (72) Good night (1847) Bad night (15715)
• Favorite

  (564): View more from Washington

  I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.

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  (564): I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home. http://tfl.nu/c3b2
  Replies (9) Good night (5434) Bad night (833)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.

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  (910): He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today. http://tfl.nu/xbxf
  Replies (5) Good night (1071) Bad night (1744)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?

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  (215): Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you? http://tfl.nu/d57s
  Replies (7) Good night (1454) Bad night (954)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.

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  (907): Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina. http://tfl.nu/hpd0
  Replies (36) Good night (2681) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me

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  (707): do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me http://tfl.nu/4f25
  Replies (15) Good night (1815) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!

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  (920): YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN! http://tfl.nu/7v2u
  Replies (21) Good night (1353) Bad night (584)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.

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  (816): Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion. http://tfl.nu/6cof
  Replies (12) Good night (1040) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable

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  (562): We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable http://tfl.nu/eg4m
  Replies (3) Good night (1726) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours

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  (337): Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours http://tfl.nu/650i
  Replies (3) Good night (902) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.

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  (940): She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick. http://tfl.nu/jiew
  Replies (9) Good night (1972) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.

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  (775): My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am. http://tfl.nu/5s1a
  Replies (3) Good night (742) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig

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  (270): There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig http://tfl.nu/4pd5
  Replies (4) Good night (320) Bad night (189)

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