There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
