Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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