Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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