Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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