I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize