How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
