hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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