I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
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