a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
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