okay pat passed out under dana's car
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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