me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
