Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
