I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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