I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.