we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
