she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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