we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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