His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
