if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
